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Today's Joke

Rules of Management

  • Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 4:00 and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.
  • If it's really a "rush job," run in and interrupt me every ten minutes to inquire how it's going. That helps.
  • Always leave without telling anyone where you're going. It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.
  • If my arms are full of papers, boxes, books, or supplies, don't open the door for me. I need to learn how to function as a paraplegic and opening doors is good training.
  • If you give me more than one job to do, don't tell me which is the priority. Let me guess.
  • Do your best to keep me late. I like the office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do.
  • If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret.
  • If you don't like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversation.
  • If you have special instructions for a job, don't write them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done.
  • Be nice to me only when the job I'm doing for you could really change your life.

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